Comedian David Mitchell jokes about 007's status as a Time Lord
The comedian David Mitchell, who maintains a regular column for the Guardian, has rounded up a series of funny - and often improbable - predictions of what the public has to look forward to in 2014.
"I don't think we're really changing anything," said a [spoof] spokesperson for Eon productions. "Just making explicit what has long been heavily implied. There are lots of vampire films where they're too cool to use the word 'vampire', but it's clear from all the blood-sucking.
"Similarly, I think the fact that Bond's face keeps changing and he's apparently holding down the same extremely physical job after more than half a century makes it pretty obvious that he's a time traveller who can regenerate.
"We just never see his Tardis because, most nights, he's pulled. But it's been evident from the start. For the avoidance of doubt: we don't envisage a royalty payment to the BBC."
Read the complete column online at theguardian.com
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